Today's excitement (with a devo thought thrown in)

Today's exciting news: I thought a patient was going to jump over the counter and beat me up. Apparently there was a mix-up in communication. She thought that because she doesn't have insurance, we said we'd pay for her pregnancy. What?! Are we the nicest, most generous doctor's office in the universe? NO! We are not. She was very unhappy when I -- followed by the office manager -- told her that, no, she will either get insurance or pay several thousand dollars from her own pocket. Good times.

We also had a patient show up today in labor. Now, this is not hugely unusual here, but this woman was the furthest into labor I've ever seen. Funnily enough, she told me she was NOT going to the hospital unless the little guy stuck his head out and waved. Five minutes later, she was leaving our office, going to -- guess where -- the hospital. Of course. I could've told her that her baby was about to drop out on the floor, and I'm no nurse. Maybe she has something against Tuesdays or June 20th or something.

So, exciting times here at the OB/GYN office, but that's not what I really intend to write about this afternoon.

I have a set of 31 index cards in my car, each one with a Bible verse that really encourages me, challenges me, inspires me, etc. There's one for each day of the month (with a couple extra some months, of course). Before I get out of my car and walk into the office, I read my 'verse for the day' and think about it for a quick moment. Today's verse has become very, very important for my life. It's the verse that I want to live up to.

Song of Solomon 2:2 -- Yes, compared to other women, my beloved is like a lily among thorns.

I'll confess, I'm a bit obsessed with this verse. I think about it a lot. It's kind of my measuring stick -- am I a lily or a thorn?

Lilies are beautiful, soft, inviting, lovely. You just kind of want to touch them and look at them and bury your face in them. They make people happy and freely offer their beauty. And they smell good, too! In contrast, thorns are prickly, sharp, unattractive, and kind of send the message: 'Get back! Stay away!' Thorns are not approachable. They can be painful.

There are days when I am most definitely a thorn. Probably more days than I care to admit.

I believe the point Solomon was trying to make with this verse was that his beloved was not only beautiful, soft, inviting, encouraging, and lovely, she was rare. She stood out from the other women he saw and knew. There was something different about her. She had that je ne sais quoi.

I want to be the lily. I want to be rare and unique and different. I don't want to be like everyone else, just another thorn.

The challenging thing is, being the lily is not easy. That's why they're rare. It's far, far easier to just follow the crowd and do what everyone else is doing, to get comfortable with the status quo. I fall into that category a lot, sadly. I take the easy, pain-free, what-comes-natural-to-me way out. But deep down, my heart longs to do what it takes to be the lily. It will mean sacrifice and leaving the comfort zone. It might mean ridicule from the 'thorns' around me. And I've found that surrendering to God is never a painless procedure. I have a feeling that becoming the lily is kind of like the process it takes to purify gold and silver -- hot, intense, cleansing, and ultimately, transforming.